Monday, August 4, 2008


A few days ago, my mom took me to take my permit test. I was excited and yet nervous inside. I fell in line outside the DMV, due to long line it was hella hot standing outside, since it was crowded. Got a number and waited for my number to be called. Even if i felt all nervous inside, i had confidence in myself. I prayed the night before and before the test that i would pass this test along with my prayer of meeting phil and the jababwockeez face to face and up close in person. I thought about how it would be a waste of money just to retake it if i failed, but if i needed to retake it i would since i wanna drive. And plus i need that money for Freestyle Session and ABDC Tour to see my phil from the jabbawockeez (; And i still need a answer from my parents, into letting me to freestyle, like i mention, i need a answer already! I need them to take me more seriously, im not kidding, im tired of waiting for them to say something. It's making me mad. Happily, i passed my test ! I was a bit more happier since i ace it, i was able to refund my money, since they said if you get 100 percent, you can get your money. My parents were proud lol, haha. After the DMV, my mom and i went to budget to get my 80 dollars back. The guy was funny when he returned my money, he was all like "congratulations, so what are you gonna do with the money that you've earned?". I was all like, "i don't know. (Thinking in my head, Phil came to my mind lmao, and JABBAWOCKEEZ which led me to thinking about Freestyle & ABDC Tour.)". Honestly, im happy i took my test, but if things were to fall differently that day and having me not get a 100percent on it, and missing a few questions it wouldn't be a big deal, at least i passed right? I asked my mom if i could keep the money and she was like "sure." Behind the wheel awaits me now, i need to take that shit (which is hella expensive -__-) and i can drive and wait 6 months til i can get my licensce. But wth, it is hella expenisve, you have to take 3 days of behind the wheel right, but 2 hours is already $70 ! My parents will be bustin their butts tryna pay this off, i feel bad for them, i regret it and feel guilty at times, at times i just asked them for so much and they try their best to give me it. I'm quite assure, that my parents will start thinking twice about me going to freestyle AGAIN, since the behind the wheel class is so expensive. Forsure, I assume my parents will say that i can't go to freestyle due to the expenses for my driving crap. Now i have money for freestyle, but i need more, since there's ABDC Tour coming up. Patiently, i want to go to freestyle, hopefully i can go. Convincing my parents, to bring me there, or letting me go with some friends who is up to give me ride is still a unknowable decision. I'm attempting to just walk there, since it feels like i have no hope of having them bringing me there or geting a ride from someone, and probably since their so over protected. I want a miracle. Hopefully they'll let me, i've been beggin, and praying hard to GOD <3

Teen Choice Awards are on tonight, i'm just excited for the jabbawockeez to perform, other than that, i'm a bit dissapointed since i found out that jabbas didn't win any award, and i voted like non-stop for them. Ohh yeah, i'm gonna start listening for a girl who is screaming in the audience, since my friend CHRYSTAL, got to go the TCA live! I'll probably be screaming myself too but at home when i see Jabbas appear and perform on TV. PHIL<33

Saturday, August 2, 2008

Visualize The Future

So many things are planned for me this summer, obviously i know i can't make it to all of them. Due to the fact, i have no ride, and I'm lacking of MONEY. I'm tired of asking my parents for money and yet giving me rides to far places, and forsurely i know they wouldn't wanna drive me 2 hours away from home for something their not up for. They don't get nothing in return but just an empty wallet, and tiredness. I don't wanna end up being a burden to them, just because something i want i can't get, i know they've raise me well, and have supported me so much, i don't know how i'll repay them as my loving parents. But asking them to for something i really love, i hope they will end up understanding, which i'll doubt. I'll beg my heart out, just to go. I've always wish that i had my licencse to drive my own car and yet a job, so i wouldn't have to worry about my own transportation and my own expenses. At least i wish i tried to get a working permit, which is fine. But there's only one more month of summer and its its too late already. The job permit would help me get the experience of a job and what it has to offer. And yet ABDC Tour and Freestyle Session are yet still months or weeks away, it seems so near. I seem to be going crazy because i really wanna go. Wow, getting the chance to see the JABBAWOCKEEZ, probably up close in person, or meeting them personally, would be an unexplainable feeling, especially seeing phil or meeting him would be a miracle. For these special events, i don't know what my mood entirely will be. Surprisingly, i actually don't know what i'll be feeling if i get the chance to go seem then in person. I don't want to end up planning how i'll act or feel if i meet them, to that point, i want it to be unexpected. I want to expect something out of the ordinary towards myself, a feeling that i'll always remember and love. Obviously, my obsession for Phil Tayag and the Jabbawockeez is very attacthing, i seem to not let go of it. I think about it as days past by, and yet when i know that these events are soon to approach, i get more excited, and end up smiling. I don't know if this obsession of mine will ever end, yet it's only begun. I don't even know if what I'm feeling, is right or wrong, its just something i feel emotionally happy to be exact.

It's august already and I'm pretty stoked about going and seeing Phil and the rest of the JABBAWOCKEEZ, and Freestyle Session is still a questionable decision towards my parents. I really can't wait for their decision, I want to know if i can go, because time is moving. Tickets are already on sale, and i still don't know what will happen. Hopefully i can go to freestyle, so i can meet my JABBAFAM x3OG, who are yet truly amazing people who share the same interest as me, and thats the JABBAs. ABDC TOUR, im hella stoked for this one too and yet pretty EXCITED, i am forsure trying my best to make it to this one, even though its months away, i've been anxiously always wondering when the tickets will go on sale. I always end up having a feeling of being left behind and not be able to purchase my tickets. I know i end up with this feeling because i know that, a million people will are trying to get tickets to this spectacular event too. I know that, if i don't get my tickets for the tour, i will totally be devestated and crushed. Believe me, i will. I'll end up crying. Trust me, getting Phil's autograph or a yet a single picture with him, will make me so happy, i won't be able to explain it, i'll just be speechless. I want that day to come, and hopefully that day will be the tour day or freestyle when they come to LA. I want to go to both so badly, as for myself, time will only tell when i'll have this kind of oppurtunity again. Base on money issues, tickets are hella expensive for the VIP tickets, i'm not sure if the regular tickets will be worth it if your hella far away, and you can't see them perform. There would be no point, i might as well bring binoculars to see them, if the distance is far. As a insane fan for Phil, i know it wil be hard to approach him, due to other fans just like me who have the same taste, we will try to get through and see our favorite jabba even if it meant sacrificing. I know for a fact Phil, will be mobbed around tons of girls, but i'll still have my hopes of seeing him UP CLOSE AND HIM SEEING ME. I don't wanna give up, but don't wanna expect so much either. I don't want to expect alot and just end up in tears.
I am so not gonna past something like this. I WILL GO THIS EVENT, i will hella strive my best to get me to Phil. I am that determined, and ill never back down til i get that chance of meeting him face to face! And getting a picture with him and an autograph. I want him to know, that i am madly insane for him, and that i truly exist in this world. I know i sound stupid just because im so many years younger, but who gives a fuck anways.

Seeing on them on tv makes me scream my lungs out! All these videos and pictures i see on youtube, had made me realized, probably i'll get that chance of meeting them. It always made me think more in a superior stage than what i've thought of before which is negativity. Every single youtube video or picture i see, gives me happiness. As the stories i've heard about meeting them with other fans have made me jealous, very jealous. Those people are so lucky! I hope i'll have that moment too, a moment for me to remember my whole life. I want to have that feeling, and i wanna cherish it, and tell people that "YES, i've actually met the jabbawockeez and phil in person" and i would wanna tell how it felt to someone. Obviously i want my turn to come..and i pray every night just for that experience and chance to come true. All my screaming for them, show how truly i've isanely crazy over them, especially PHIL<3

JABBAFAM x3OG, i'm very glad that i am apart of this amazing family. Going on chatzy, has made me hella addicted, but i don't care. Since i know, that the jabbas come in and out to just talk to us. I'm pretty glad they took the time to come in chatzy and talk to us fans, it really has meant alot to us. Even if it meant talking to us from a different timezone and place, even how tired they must be from all their performances. Jabbafam x3OG have so many great and creative ideas, and im so excited to what we have so plan for us. The tshirts are one thing, i hella CAN'T wait for the shirts to come out. I'm excited for all the designs, and colors, my dope jabbafam has created for our very first tshirt. They are so brilliant, we even have a hand sign! I'm trying my best to submit my own design for the shirt, hopefully i can get it in before we start voting. Hell yeah, if i get my shirt, i'll be sure wearing it, so the world can see it and how we represent from everywhere not just CALI. I wanna shine it off to everyone (: and tell them, that we are JABBAFAM x3OG ! Also, meeting my jabbafam in reality is another thing that i would want to happen, i would entirely want to meet, all these wonderful and beautiful people out there, who has made me hella happy ! I love every each and one of them <3

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

The Beginning

And so summer begins, and the weather has been really buggin' me. The fans are turned on high and its still fuckin' hot, and i cant sleep properly at night. First blog in blogspot, since i know no one barely sees my blogs in xanga. Finally, i found my APHISTORY book that ive been lookin all over the house for, now i can finish parts of the tons of summer assignment i needa do. I needa stop slacking each day and start beginning these summer assignments before august comes around. Yesss, just one more month. One more month til' i get my permit. Finish drivers ed quite a long time ago, and anxious to take my permit at the DMV. I'm quite scared, excited, and pretty nervous. It'll suck if i dont pass, hopefully i do though, since i know how much the testes are, they're quite alot just for a piece of paper -__- and taking it twice is not gonna be so well for me. By the end of July imma start preparin' and have a couple of days to studybefore i head to the DMV, so i can stick all the review questions in my head before i go. Wow, summer has been flyin' by fast, i know for a fact i wont be able to accomplish all the things and events i wanna do this summer, knowing for a fact i have summer homework to finish. At least i finish the english portion, just need to revise the essay. I'm pretty glad and happy i got to order online the THEMOVEMENT mixtape cd that ive been wanting for quite 2 weeks, and i was pretty excited that i just got it in the mail a few days ago. Im pretty sike, to start listening to it. I still wanna see phil tayag in person, ive been wanting to see him this whole summer, hopefully this will happen. In additon, i know it will be hard, but ill find a way. At least see him rapp or dance, or face to face. I'm pratically insane for him <3